Celebration and Mourning

Celebration, Mourning.

My youngest sister got married. It was the most amazing wedding I have ever been too. Everyone I love and have known forever was there.

My sister and her new husband have a beautiful relationship and they were truly celebrated.

We are so proud of them.

As this was the very best day of their life (hopefully more to come), there are so many emotions that come to the surface around family, past family of origin pain, divorce, death, loneliness, self-worth, personal identity within a framework that you may or may not have experienced in years.

Family reunions can have similar effects, funerals, anywhere where so many intertwined histories combine can create emotional experiences that can range from uncomfortable to completely overwhelming.

What is beautiful about this emotionally charged kind of event is that there are so many opportunities for sharing, supporting. Telling people you love them, or that you are sorry. Finding hope in what your loved ones have overcome or created, that you may do the same.

It has taken me a full two days to process all of the amazing interactions I had that night.

The beauty of two truly amazing people getting married, reconnecting with those I love, missing those who are no longer with us.

There is room for all of it.
We are messy emotional human-folk of course.
We all belong no matter what we’ve done.
Our feelings are valid.
Our pain and suffering are real.
Our joy is real.

So in times of celebration, when all the feelings rise up, allow them. Recognize them, name them to honor them.
But most importantly, heal them.
For yourself, and the life you wish to create.

Release, and remember the good parts that you want to keep.
Forgive yourself and others, because the opposite is what is keeping humanity locked against one another.

Never forget we all matter. Because we do.
Center in love, and non-judgment.
And party your ass off with all the people you love.

Cry a little if it hurts.

With love and celebration,

Alissa

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